I'm so impatient

I couldn’t even finish the title.

How is that for im

Too much energy?

patient?

did it again! ‘M I bad.

I have a lot of energy these days–mentally especially– because of Atkins removing the belly button lint from my head. Now I have a lot of things to say and to think, and not all of them are written down.

It’s a Sickness

Take last night, for instance. I cleaned my kitchen at 8pm. At night. Just because I wanted it clean.

When you’re one of a large family, many of whom don’t know where you’re supposed to leave a bowl or a cup, let alone your son’s baking project (those poor Jewish people must have really eaten unleavened cake), the kitchen quickly falls apart without due diligence.

I put in my Beastie Boys CD (don’t look at me that way) and cleaned the entire thing, and feel so much better about things. There’s a lot to be said for a clean kitchen. Until breakfast.

You’ve gone and lost your RV in the tall weeds

My husband likes RVs. We’re about to sell number 6. Or is it number 5? I lose count. Frankly, I could live the rest of my life never buying, selling or riding in another RV ever again. To me, they’re houses with mechanical problems. I have enough issues with two bathrooms and one kitchen. Now you want to saddle me with more areas for teenagers to decimate? And a transmission?

Still, it’s those things he enjoys, so I am happy for him. He’s also leveled off the comments about the number of pillows I keep on the bed.

Large, gas-guzzling Winnebago. Small bed pillows. We get by.

Valentine’s Day Success

I don’t know whether it’s the lack of warm weather or the copious amounts of chocolate everywhere, but Valentine’s Day was easy– the rest of the time has been more difficult. I want to eat things that don’t even seem very good to me.

I think it’s the American Dream. We have, and we want more, even if it’s a bowl of yogurt.

And how sad is that– missing a bowl of yogurt?

There’s something monumentally which flickers and dies out there in the intellectual wilderness when you’re jonesing for a big bowl of the bovine white stuff in solid form.

With blueberries.

Modified OWL

I’ll get to dairy soon enough, though. There’s always modified OWL– all of the deliciousness of the Atkins rungs but without the guilt or slowed weight loss.

For anyone out there wanting to move into OWL but who don’t particularly want to slow down weight loss or worry about blood sugar instability, hunger and cravings as a result of moving on, modified OWL is a good plan to consider.

Modified OWL (for anyone who doesn’t yet know) is climbing the Atkins OWL rungs (2002 plan) while remaining at induction-level carbohydrate counts (20 net carbs). This process serves several purposes:

1. It allows for more variety. If you’re bored to tears with induction, even with myriad food choices, it’s better to move up the rungs and begin experimenting with food than to risk dabbing melted chocolate on your pulse points, 6 of which you’ve decided were under your tongue.

2. It keeps cravings in check because the high-fat and protein coupled with very limited carbohydrate amounts of new foods (about 5 per serving per day) keep you in ketosis;

3. Because of the very high-fat; low-carbohydrate levels you’re still following, when you do hit a food which causes you problems, you’re going to know it immediately; still damage will be minimal.

4. OWL serves as a rotation diet for people trying to pinpoint food intolerances. Because you’re having to share those 20 net carbohydrates with a serving of something ‘new’ at set intervals, you are going to know right away if you have a sensitivity towards carrots (me!), macadamia nuts (ooh ooh! Pick me! Pick me!) or mushrooms (I always thought he was a fun-gi).

OK. Gotta scoot. I have people to micromanage and socks to track down. It’s a living. Such lint-free socks.

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