On the title: Ooh, how cliche, you say! How facile, you lament!
How wise like an Einsteinian plate of win, I say. Put away the lulz and keep reading.
We overload ourselves come January 1. Not only are we going to lose weight, but we’re going to stop smoking, save third world countries, and look so good in a halter that even Posh Spice’s breasty bits pout in shame.
We resolve to: jog 3 miles per day (even if we’ve never put a jogging shoe on our peds), drink a gallon of pure, spring-fed artesian water everyday, do yoga (I’m partial to strawberry myself), take 37 vitamins at each meal, detox regularly, and adopt a puppy every week.
Come on. Who died and made you Captain America? You’re not supposed to posture for your upcoming high school reunion. We want easy, attainable changes that mean something. So let’s drop the perfunctory perfection pretenses and hit the meat punching bag of reason.
Try these simple tips for making change that you are already on the road to making.
Drink 6-8ounce glasses of liquid a day. Yes, coffee and tea count. Yes, drinking more is better, and don’t forget foods contain water as well. Liquids are filling and help keep skin supple, so drink them, but don’t drown yourself.
Get more exercise. Put down the phone. I didn’t just tell you to run out and buy the Ab-grabber deluxe sponsored by Tony Biddle, the enigmatic celebrity with huge, gleaming teeth. Take the stairs instead of the elevator when feasible. Park farther away from your workplace or store.Walk to the post office when you can. In short, do what you can for your physical shape and capabilities. Just being on feet more often burns more fat.
Toss the junk. Notice I didn’t tell you to run right down to Holistic Foods and plop down $500 in Fruit leathers. I told you to dump the Haagen Daas and to Emancipate from the English Muffins from your kitchen. Getting the junk out of the house is easy. If you can, donate non-parishable goods locally to a food center. Just get it outta there!
Changes should appeal to our inner lazy, and not try to mold ourselves into something we aren’t.
Next: Baby Steps.
This is part of the 5-part anti-Resolution resolve: No Resolutions, Get Smart, Less is More, Baby Steps, Tom Petty Wisdom