The granola moment (Day 141)

kitchenmessIs it finally Friday yet?

Whoopie! I can hardly stand it. I say hardly, meaning I can not only stand that it’s Friday, and I can sit in it and roll in it, too.

BTW, I am showing you a picture of my kitchen in its typically messy state. Yes, there are the usual things: a Birthday mug, some kite string, peanut butter, cocoa powder, and lemon juice. It’s like a MacGuyver contraption for blowing a door open. In your colon.

Speaking of rolling and blowing and colons…

Last night I had what I am going to call a granola moment.

You know that moment? It’s the instant when you think, You know; I can’t eat that Triscuit there, so I am going to enjoy a couple of gluten-free, spicy Nut Thins dipped in sour cream. What a delight!

Only that isn’t what happens.

Why, you ask? Oh why? Why, my friends? Because, I respond. Because you have children. That is why. Oh yes. That is why, indeed.

Because you are now standing there at midnight in your kitchen, in your underpants, bathed in only the golden gossamer light beams of your Kenmore refrigerator, and you open the sour cream container only to find that was once a 16-ounce plastic vehicle brimming with tart semi-solids has apparently magically evaporated into a tablespoon of yellow sour cream juice and a dried pinkie-sized blob of coagulated dairy product quivering on the side of the now-echoing, vast chamber. And no one never ever thought to note the need for more sour cream on the shopping list only a foot from where the empty container now rested. So, as a result, you eat two or three handfuls of granola out of spite. Because you can. Because you really wanted sour cream. And because you hope when someone opens the box in the morning they say, “WHO ATE MAH GRANOLA!” so you can just sit there and you put your hand to your chest in a mock gesture as if to say, “Who? ….ME?!”

That, my friends, is a granola moment.

Last night I had that moment.

Positive takeaway: I learned something important about myself–No more granola. And keep sour cream doubly-stocked.


Now on to how I’ve been doing with my weight loss and continued sussing out of foods to which I’m intolerant or allergic to… Be sure to do your thing. I am thrilled share my progress and thoughts, but I’m not the person you should necessarily look to for dieting advice (I’m not a paid nosh-a-titian). Be sure to subscribe for updates by adding your email right (in the sidebar) or through Feedburner in the title bar up top. You can also click the tab up top that says Mid-Year Resolution for regular updates.

Thursday, January 10

I ate this:
Breakfast: Nothing. My granola moment was really late last night. Let’s face it; I typically skip breakfast.
Lunch: Turkey jerky
Dinner: Cottage cheese, olives, seeds, and Parmesan cheese (I’m feeling a little bit sick tonight. I think I have a virusy thing)

Notes: I typically am not an early-morning eater, but you’ll notice, if anything, I eat more toward the end of the day. That’s when I’m more naturally hungry (and not necessarily due to blood sugar dropping, although sometimes…) When do you tend to eat the most?

What I learned:

As an aside, so different from my perfectionist, all-or-nothing days, I don’t hate myself for my granola moment.

I didn’t give myself the no-no face of guilt. I am not re-starting again (you kidding? The first time through sucks). I don’t curse myself, thinking I may have set my weight loss back forever (inflammatory water weight gain isn’t exactly like marathon eating at the dessert buffet. It’s water retention and not caloric imbalance causing gain in the form of fat accumulation). I don’t think I’m a failure (a lamer occasionally, but not a failure).  I don’t say Er ners! I CHEATED ON MY DIET!  Those are all negative, false emotions. I don’t have time for that! I record the experience and I move forward because I learned something: I am averse to oats.

So how about you? Can you forgive yourself a granola moment and move forward? I think you should. Negative emotions push you towards ‘falling off of the wagon,’ and you’re too legit to risk being stomped on by the horse. Besides, there are bugs on the ground. Ewww. And horse poo. Ewww!

Occasional granola moments happen. Make the next one a scientific experiment, journal, be accountable, and keep going. This isn’t about “you” and your self worth (is your self-worth really wrapped up in bacon?); it’s about your health and how you subsist, long-term, with the foods (like [no]oats, for me) you’re going to have access to more than once.

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  1. Sigh. That said, do you have a granola recipe? I’ve been working on a granola bar recipe, and thought I might be able to crumble those…but the taste is so not right, yet.

  2. I also don’t eat much during the day, even when I’m up early my first meal isn’t until around 1 or 2 pm, sometimes later than that. I can’t help it, if you’re not hungry you don’t eat.

  3. Are there any studies out there that check out grain intolerance and low carb diets? I used to be able to tolerate psyllium and rice. I eat them now…let the sneezefest commence.

    • I think low-carbers tend to so limit grass-based foods that when we have them again, it’s pretty obvious if we react to them or not. For me, corn isn’t an issue, but wheat, spelt, rice, soy and oats are baddy badness per my reactions to them individually. I don’t at all think low-carb made me more intolerant to these foods. I was always stuffy and congested unless I was low-carb. Now I know why! (I was always blaming the native plants, or this or that, and never what I was eating.)

  4. Oh Jamie…haven’t we all had a moment such as this….but a Doctor friend of mine said this.. why do you beat yourself up when you eat something you shouldn’t…think about it and move on he said.. get back on track. Think of it like this….if you have a flat tire what do you do? Fix it, I said
    Right you fix it…you don’t pull over grap a knife and slash the other three….so they will be flat…do you?, I assured him…then stop doing that when you go off your diet!

  5. Love, love, love your post – so funny, your description of the empty container is just so spot on! And of course there is no guilt, it’s only food and it’s only one moment, and as you say going back to the beginning is not for the faint of heart – it really sucks. Congrats on everything you do – I so admire you, for keeping your sense of humour as life throws empty containers at you! Love your kitchen, it’s nice not to be perfect isn’t it?

  6. Jamie, you are so funny! I have had my granola moments too. Usually with mint chocolate. I find out the effects 2 hours later when my blood sugar sky rockets because I did not cover it with enough insulin! Then I suffer the consequences of that high! Ugh! Diabetes is no picnic!

    Oh, by the way, I thought of you today when I was in Walmart! I saw a whole bunch of Hello Kitty stuff and this funny, crazy Hello Kitty lady immediately came to mind! <3

  7. Jayne Thompson says

    Oh Jamie never thought about bacon wrapped self-worth….although I like the bacon wrapped picture a LOT better than poo wrapped self-worth!!!! Thanks so much for sharing info about the Diet Cure!!!!!! She completely told my story and now my self-worth is definitely coming up and out of guilt, shame, and condemnation and I absolutely love eating sausage for breakfast!!!!!!

    • I am so glad you relate to what I relate to. I know I had so many lightbulb moments reading her books. Ross (for her reason and aminos regimen) + Atkins (because he pioneered low-carb again in the 60’s) + Dr. Phil (his older book kind of telling people they suck for blaming others for making choices) = fabulous.

  8. Excellent post! Boy can I relate to the all or nothing. I’ve gotten a lot better with that. I’m learning to forgive myself when I fail. I’m learning to move on, right then and there. It’s working!

  9. Oh my goodness, can I relate. My kids either eat my ingredients, or they munch my last [insert low-carb thing here] that I was looking forward to and then mumble, “Yeah…it’s okay.”

  10. Whenever I see your “what I ate” posts, I think, “man! She certainly doesn’t eat a lot!” I’m eighteen and I dance over 20 hours a week, so I obviously eat more than you, but did you used to eat more when you were around 20 and your metabolism has just slowed since then?

    • Hi, Mary! Naturally, I eat probably close to 1200 calories per day. I eat one, maybe two meals, depending on hunger. I think I’m one of those people who accumulates fat so that I don’t have to eat as often. My body is snacking on my thighs! Nyuck Nyuck!

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